When I grow up…..

The question that haunts you as you grow older.

“what do you want to do when you grow up?”

it is phrased differently depending on the age of the questioned. its a question that no one can escape.

when you are young and get asked the question any answer is acceptable. A pirate, princess, singer, astronaut…………………….the list goes on. These answers are acceptable because you are young and innocent looking and no one takes what you say seriously.

But at the age of 15/16 it seems that you have to know what your ambition in life is and you need to have a career planned out for the next 40 or so years. When picking GCSEs and A-levels they are classed as being something that will depend on the path of your future and the right choice is necessary. Its Crazy to think that major life choices are to be made when you are at the young age of 16 where all you care about is having a good time.

Everyone knows that life isn’t simple. You don’t get what you want. Life throws hurdles left right and centre. 

I have always answered this question with “I don’t know”

But the thing is that I kinda do.

I want to be someone who makes an impression. Someone who will be remembered for doing something good.

I am going  to ‘Seek a greater perhaps’ (a bit of a John Green looking for Alaska quote for all you nerdfighters) and find my true calling.

I want to make a difference. 

no wait………..

I am going to make a difference. 

The Book Thief by Markus Zusak

YOU ARE GOING TO DIE

1939 Nazi Germany. The country is holding its breath. Death has never been busier.

Liesel, a nine-year old girl, is living with a foster family on Himmel Street. Her parents have been taken away to a concentration camp. Liesel steals books. This is her story of the inhabitants of her street when the bombs begin to fall.

 

THIS NOVEL IS NARRATED BY DEATH

It’s a story, about;

A girl

An accordionist

Some fanatical Germans

A Jewish fist fighter

And quite a lot of thievery.

DEATH WILL VISIT THE BOOK THIEF THREE TIMES

The only reason I decided to read this book is because I saw the film trailer and thought it looked amazing. I was really intrigued by the storyline and when I realised that it is a book I had to read so that I could abide with my number one rule. ALWAYS read the book before the film.

So with the first chance I had I went to a book shop and purchased the last copy of the book thief that the shop had. I began to read it when I got home and two days later I am sat in my room crying at the ending and at the tragedy of my favourite character Rudy.

The characters in this book are just amazing and are impossible to not fall in love with. Yes that’s right even the agitated whistler Pfiffikus. The main character Liesel is really relatable to. She is just a girl who has a passion for reading who will stop at no means to get hold of a precious book. Each character can be relatable to everyday life. Hans the caring compassionate man, Rosa the stern mother who just cares too much. There’s Rudy, the dreamer, the boy who won’t let anyone stop him and Liesel, the girl who has had a hard life but that only attributes to the amount of compassion she shows to her adopted mama and papa, a stranger who would be dead without her family and arguably some of the worst Himmel street inhabitants imaginable.

Markus Zusak has done an amazing job at writing this book and the fact that he has used Death as the narrator is just ingenious. There are many beautiful quotes said by death about how war is the boss of death and how death himself (let’s just presume death is a he) is just doing his orders under the orders of war. And the most amazing quote is said at the end when we have found out what has become of Liesel Meminger.

“I am haunted by humans”

It makes the reader feel the emotions of death and how some acts performed by humans he just cannot forget and how some deaths do haunt him and it leads us to realise that the story of Liesel probably haunts him the most. It’s not because it is the most sad or gruesome story. But because of the people affected. Lots of different types of people from the truest of Germans to the Jewish. From the old to the young. It’s a story about survival, love and books.

City of Bones the movie

 

So I am a HUGE Mortal instruments fan and I waited what felt like an eternity to see this film.

I am a huge fan of the books and as it is well known in the fandom world. when you read a book before the film you are immediately setting your expectations high because of the literary genius of the author.

us fangirls/fanboys are constantly judging films on there books and most seem to be a great hit.

I was very happy with the cast for this film. I was looking forward to watching Jamie and lily. I had never heard of Robert Sheehan and at first was a little worried because I did not view simon the way that rob looked. but I warmed to him and in the film I thought that he rocked the part.

I loved how the film presented Cassandra Clare’s novel. it was quite different to the book. many people have had different views on the way it was made but I give it thumbs up. for me it being slightly different to the book made it more interesting. it was a different take on the book but still had all the key elements in it. Jace had the right amount of sarcasm, Alec was moody and yet his love for Jace was noticeable. Isabelle had the right amount of sassiness that made her character just AMAZING, simon was the misunderstood best friend that he was described to be and clary was, well she was awesome.

one thing that I did notice, and its just me be stupid was  that when valentine said “to love is to destroy” he didn’t finish of the quote. it is just a picky fangirl thing but it is one of my most favourite quotes. (though the all time best is “I’m a werewolf, not a golden retriever”)

all in all this film was just amazing and I recommend it to everyone. But you should also read the books because nothing is better then a book. and these books are amazing !! 😀

Book review: The Hunger Games

The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins

 

This is a book that made me laugh, cry (if you’ve read the book you know which bits I am on about here) and truly appreciate the society that we today live in how many thing are taken for granted.

Here’s a summary of the novel with as few spoilers as possible J

Katniss Everdeen Volunteers at the reaping to take her sisters place as the female tribute for the 74^th Annual Hunger games. The hunger games are a cruel sport designed by the Capitols Leader President Snow where children must fight to the death in the arena. As punishment of the rebellion each year the 12 various districts of Panem must offer up in tribute 1 young male and female who will fight to the death in an arena till one lone victor remains. This victor will be bathed in riches to show the generosity of the capitol. Katniss and her fellow tribute Peeta Mellark are sent to the capitol to be showcased to the capitol citizens and trained for the Games. But when the Games begin it is apparent that the 74^th  Annual Hunger Games will be interesting.

This novel was first published in 2008 and from then has had another two books published (Catching Fire and Mockingjay). Also the hunger games has been made into a much loved film with catching fire expected in November.

This novel tackles many different themes. These themes include poverty, starvation and the effects of war on a large scale. It shows how war has manipulated the inhabitants of the country and especially there leader, who creates the games which indicates to the reader just how much power he holds over the citizens of Panem and how the power of his status has made him act and how he expresses his power (The Hunger Games). The novel teaches the reader about what it is like to live in poverty and what it leads people to act.

This book may teach about poverty and power but also friendship and loyalty. This is apparent in some of the characters. One in particular is the character Rue. The youngest of the tributes rue is seen to be the weakling and the easiest to kill. But she is underestimated. It is an unlikely friendship and alliance with the main character that leads to the theme of friendship and loyalty. Anyone who has read this amazing book knows which part I am on about. The compassion and the care that is shown to a stranger by our heroin is just unbelievable.

Over all this book is well written and is a great read. The characters all have there own unique qualities that make the book extra special. It touches many topics that can sometimes be over looked and brushed aside. It’s a must read for all you people put there that love a book with adventure, romance, death. A good book needs some element of death. And heart stopping (also warming) moments.    

The Horror of laptop shopping

So I am writing this blog on my new laptop, bought just a few hours ago. But it was not an easy buy.

Me and my family arrived at the shop and went inside over to where the laptops where and started to browse. I was looking for something that I can use for college and for something that wasn’t to expensive since I am paying for it and a part time job doesn’t bring in to much money.

I saw a lonely Dell laptop at the end of an isle and though that it was perfect. it was modern looking but not to flashy. it was the type of laptop that a nerd like me would love. An odd bod in the world of laptops. But the man in the store just said it was old and slow and that “no one has dell laptops” which then talked my mum out of the laptop so I wasn’t allowed to go near that one again.

this may sound odd but I did feel sorry for that laptop. it wasn’t a new brand and therefore was frowned upon.

Its just how society is these days.

in the end I bought a nice red HP laptop and I do love it. Although we spent what felt like hours in the shop just wondering around looking.

If only shopping was easier.

The Swing

here is a piece of writing that i did that i thought i would share.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Swing lulls me as it goes back and forth. Its steady rhythm creates a sort of piece within me as I stare out at the woodland that surrounds the lonely, paint chipped swing long forgotten and replaced by computers and video games.

As I stare at the trees, there autumn leaves soundlessly floating to the ground in the cold breeze; I think about what it would be like to escape. To just get up and go. I will not lie. I have thought about it, about just going home packing a bag and leaving, but what would be the point, I wouldn’t make it nearly half as far as what I would like. I would be dragged home to my father. And then suffer the consequences.   

I have dreamed about it, living out in the woods. The animals and the trees my only companions. The only time I can dream about my life away from life is at the swing. My mind wonders as my trainers drag across the worn concrete.

“You’re too old to day dream” I get told when I’m caught staring at the wall “you should be doing the cleaning”. And when I’m scribbling in my notebook “you should be out doing something useful instead of writing some crap!”

“Since when was 15 to old” I answer back. Which I regret each time but for the few seconds that the words flow from my tongue I feel like I have proved him wrong.

HA! You would have thought I had learned by now.

There’s always an answer from him, an excuse that makes me sound like some low life and then he would bring up my mum. Before he says more I run from the house. Dragging on my hoodie and worn trainers. To the swing.  This is where I take out the picture. I never leave anywhere without it.

A woman with blonde flowing hair is sat on a wooden chair. Her Blue eyes ablaze with joy, her lips stretched in a warm smile, white straight teeth in view. And on her knee is a boy. With matching blue eyes and blonde hair, his arms around her neck in a strangling hug. The mother son bond visible in their faces.

My mother and my brother, both taken from me.  My mother was the one who told me about the swings. It was the last thing she had said to me.

There had been a car crash and my little brother hadn’t survived. He was only 7. We were at the hospital, my mother lay in a bed. My father had gone for a smoke. I was 12 at the time. I was sat on the chair next to the bed when my mother said my name.

“Jude” her weak voice called.

“I need to tell you something before it’s too late” I nodded my head about to ask what but mum cut in.

“I’m going to leave soon. I’m going to be going with your little brother Jake, he needs me to look after him and I know you will be brave but I want you to know I will never leave you.”

“But mum I need you to” was all I said I was at the age where I knew what she was talking about.”

“I know Jude. just remember this” she paused there and took a deep breath. I can see her face in my mind, the life draining from her eyes as she struggled to tell me one last thing. “if you e…..e….ever need me go to the swing. Th….the one near the W…wo…wood. I’ll always b…b…be there”

When she finished I just stared at her. I saw a tear roll down her face and then there was a long beep. This was the first time in an age that I had ever called her “mommy” I shouted it at her as I was rushed out of the room.

That memory stays with me forever  

Ever since that day I have come to the swings when I have been in trouble, I have even run from school. People ask why the swing? I just stay silent.

Every time I great my mum

“Hi mum, I love you”     

  

Weekly Photo Challenge: Focus

I know I am not a great photographer but I though it would be fun to try it out. So here’s the Picture 🙂

Did you pass ?

There’s a saying that goes something like “if you do not succeed the first time then try again” but what 16 year olds received in there envelope this morning was not something that could be re-done if failed.

So for many today it is results day. The day where 16 year olds have to arise from there fitful slumber to go to their school, which some will be leaving after a long yet unforgettable 5 years, to get an envelope which contains the results that many have been dreading to see.

It is a nerve racking time for the young teens. The piece of paper is there life line. It will tell them if they are able to study there chosen subjects if they chose to embark on the adventure of sixth form or if they will succeed in getting into a chosen collage course.

But not only have the teens suffered from the nerves on such a big day but also the parents and guardians. They are the ones who sit nervously in the car (because there child doesn’t need to have their mom with them) or stood round the corner of the school. Anxiously chewing away at their nails as their beloved son and/or daughter receive their results. Parents stand in silence praying that there will be cause to celebrate and dreading the thought of having to be there for the disappointed child who didn’t get what was wanted and has to hold them as they cry and tell them it’s ok when in their heads are a abundance of questions about where to go from here, what to say, what to do.  

But we also can’t forget the teachers in all of this. They are the ones that taught the student all that was needed to pass the exam and are relied to help the child get the grade. You can just imagine the amount of nerves that kept them awake that night knowing that secretly there teaching will be judged but believing that their students have hopefully done them proud.

So. An anxious day for everyone. But at the end of the day it is what it is as we can’t change it.

And remember

Always be who you are   😀

Weekly Writing Challenge. 1,000 words

I can feel the cold, rusty metal pressing against my hands. The coldness doesn’t bother me, neither does it bother me that I am alone, I am the tiny ant dodging my way to safety. I spend most of my time alone, not wanted at home, just a little girl with no place in this monstrous world. It’s cold outside but I don’t mind, I’m going to my friends. I’m going to be free.

  This is my refuge, sat on the lonely roundabout; the metal figures my only companions. Two unwanted creations to keep each other company through the days of endless wondering. I lean back against the Roundabout and close my eyes.

First there is only blackness as my eyes search the vastness of my eye lids. I only have to wait a few seconds and then it begins. In the corner I spot a small light, I reach for it with all my might and the further I reach the closer it gets. All the weight is lifted from my shoulders as I get closer. My Brian starts to swirl, colours explode like bursts of paint making a kaleidoscope work its wonders for only me to see. The metal figures come to life; they slowly move their heads, turning them this way and that, freeing them from their slumber. They all crowed around me there painted eyes aglow with the pleasure of being free, even when there freedom is limited, the sands of the timer are slowly running out.

The show begins then, the white horse rears up. Even though the paint is slightly chipped this doesn’t distract me from the beauty and brilliance of this little creature. I mount her saddle, it feels hard under me but I ignore it, I’m not going to let it ruin my bliss. I hold onto the cold metal of the horses neck as the horse starts to gallop off, my other friends at our heals.

We gallop through green fields; all I can do is laugh, my voice rising in pitch as we gather speed. The wind is tugging at my hair and rattles my ears, it hurts but I don’t want to stop. I don’t want this magical moment to end. When finally we do stop we stop under a tall tree. I look up into the high branches; the sun penetrates the areas of leafless branch creating a disco ball effect on the grass. Instead of the wind rattling my ears I hear the songs of a thousand birds perched high up in the trees, invisible to the eye. I know the tune so I start to sing it to.

The lyrics roll of my tongue as I sing them in my soprano voice. My friends sit and listen to me swaying like the leaves of the trees.

 Suddenly the birds stop singing and my voice is the only thing that breaks the silence. I know what this means. It means that the time is running out. Sadness covers my face and my eyes fill with tears. I try to hold the tears back but it doesn’t work. As a tear slips down my cheek the bear lifts his rusty paw and wipes the tear from my cheek. A stray piece of hair falls onto my face as I look into the bears eyes. He swipes the hair and says
“time to go Anna” his painted mouth in an ugly smile which I know he can’t help.

I just stare for a few minutes. The thought of going back to my life is almost horrifying. I don’t want to leave. I know I will be back again tomorrow where a new adventure is waiting but the pain of leaving hurts every time. It’s like someone has just punched a hole in my chest. I stand there looking at my friends as the background starts to dissolve, it’s slow at first and I reach out to grab my friends but all I garb is air. I flail my arms blindly as the kaleidoscope of colours slowly fading till the last little light has disappeared from existence. I am alone in darkness again. I keep my eyes shut not wanting to open them, to face the real, harsh reality of my life that I am forced to live. I am alone in darkness when someone taps my shoulder. I reluctantly open my eyes to see the shop keeper stood there with a stern look on his wrinkled, olive skinned face.

“Be on your way girl” he warns in a stern voice “you know what happens if you don’t”. I turn and walk away my hand still lingering on the cold metal until the man swipes it off and I make haste before he does something worse. I get to the end of the dirty street and take one last glance at my roundabout and my friends, sat stationary on the metal circle waiting for tomorrow’s adventure.

http://dailypost.wordpress.com/2013/08/19/writing-challenge-1000-words-four/

The Book With No Faults

I am a person who loves to read. I am a sucker for a story that involves a little bit of mystery, adventure, death (don’t judge me every book needs a good death somewhere) and of course the romance with the possibility of a love triangle that will have fandoms arguing over which couple to ship.

The Fault in Our Stars by John Green was recommended to me by a friend who said “you HAVE to read this it will kill you”

all i thought was what a way to promote a book, telling me it will kill me?!?!?!

But i went and read the book and it changed my whole perspective on everything. For people who have never read this and are thinking that one book can not change a persons view on life then you NEED to read this book. 

The book is inspired by a young girl called Esther Earl. Esther (like me) was a Nerdfighter and sadly died of cancer in 2010 aged 16 and the fault in our stars is dedicated to her. if you want to find out more about this there is a foundation called “this star won’t go out” as this will always reminded us of her love for others.

This book taught me that life shouldn’t be wasted. That life should be lived to the full and nothing less. It made me realize that we as humans take to many things for granted, we are privileged enough to have clean water, supply of food that take almost no hassle to obtain, we have all this great technology and then all the things that are seen as the ‘little’ things like freedom, the ability to love, to express our voices, to live. 

I will not go into great detail about the book because it will ruin it for anyone who reads this and decides that they may give it a try. But the story is molded around the main Character Hazel and also the Character Augustus ‘Gus’ Waters. it tells there progression of  there friendship and the hardships that have been handed to them.

It is a must read guys. Even if you don’t enjoy reading this is one for everyone. It is a sensitive topic but it is written in the best way possible.

Don’t forget Guys

Always be who you are 😀